Today I want to share a bit of my own personal experience with you. Because if someone like me can improve her relationships by improving her communication, that means you can too. Here’s a quick overview of my communication success story. Plus, I’ve got a free live webinar coming up this Saturday that will help you have a communication success story too. Check out the details at the end of the post.
If you’ve been around Heartful Habits for a while, you already know that I grew up in a dysfunctional home. Healthy communication was not modeled or taught to me. I learned that it was the safest to keep my mouth shut and be as agreeable as possible in an effort not to set anyone else off.
So it surprised me when I found myself becoming the angry, controlling one in my romantic relationship. I maintained the opposite side, my passive façade, in my other relationships in order to keep the peace and regularly gave away my power. So perhaps that was why I clenched onto my power and wielded it over my partner in that one relationship in my life.
I could feel that neither were an authentic way to live. Being passive and being aggressive both prevented me from being able to connect meaningfully with others. I knew I didn’t want to behave this way, but I had never seen a healthy relationship up close. I didn’t know what I was supposed to do.
While I was in college, I took a communication course in which I was trained in effective communication skills for a semester. Who knew – communication is really just a set of skills. Anyone can learn them if they put in the time and effort. (And yes, it takes time and effort and being uncomfortable and feeling stupid sometimes too.)
However, it’s been so worth it. The communication skills I learned during that semester have helped me to discover the real meanings of other people’s message instead of jumping to conclusions. I have become less judgmental and more empathetic. I speak my mind assertively and can settle conflicts with a resolution. I have learned to be caring toward others instead of care-taking (passive) or controlling (aggressive).
Free Live Webinar
I want the same for you and your relationships. If you want to have a communication success story too, come join me for my FREE live webinar 3 Steps to Communicate Assertively.
As I described above, I experienced how hard it is to find the balance of assertive communication. I would either lean one way and become a pushover or swing too far in the other direction and wind up trying to control people.
In this live webinar, I’m going to take you through three simple steps to communicate assertively. You will learn what your own assertive self looks like and how to find it even in the moment. With this know-how, you will empower yourself and others to engage in genuine, honest connection without crossing your boundaries. Channel your inner Wonder Woman with me.
The webinar will go live this Saturday, June 3rd at 12:00 noon PST. I encourage you to join me live, but if you cannot, still sign up. There will be a replay available afterward for those who registered.
What would a communication success story look like for you?